Tomorrow, tomorrow!!

What do you do when you have 2 large suitcases half packed, a carry-on to organize, glasses to get repaired, groceries to shop for, and odds and ends to complete the day before you leave for your home country after TWO LONG YEARS??? You sit at the computer and blog, of course.

Things are winding up here for us. I've got my lists, and my lists of my lists, and Tris' lists that he probably will glance at and forego for the one that's in his head. I've celebrated my 40th once already (and so it begins!) with nine beautiful ladies at the Marriott Hotel. Abby's dress is made and her hair is cut and layered (and she's learned how to maintain her wild curls), so she's ready for her grade 6 celebration. Matthew is working on final school projects and our house seems to always have teenagers hanging about. Unlike most teachers in our school, Tris' classes' exams don't begin until this week and so rather than spending his first week pining over me, he'll be up to his eyeballs in physics exams. Abby's got a countdown going in her room and there are only 11 days until school is out. Tomorrow, I fly.

I have to admit, this is the first time that I've spent alone on a jet plane. I did fly from Bali to Jakarta alone when I had dengue (it wasn't that bad) but that was a short flight. This time, I am tentative and am praying I don't forget anything. Last year was my first time alone in a hotel, when Tris had surgery in Singapore. I did that just fine and so flying shouldn't be all that difficult.

Mostly, I am so excited about heading home that I'm not sure whether I'll laugh or cry when I see my in-laws' smiling faces at the airport. I do know that it's supposed to be cold (what's with THAT??) and so as soon as I get a few visits with family in, I'll have to head out shopping. I'm sure I can handle that.

Procrastination time is over and packing and shopping continues.

Thanks for reading.

I'm coming home!

One week left and then I leave on a jet plane for YVR, via Tai Pei. I'm very, very excited, so excited that I haven't allowed myself to do a countdown until only 14 days before. I find that if I get too wrapped up in it I can't sleep, especially when I hear the call to prayer around 4-4:30 am. That's when I know I need to get up soon and my mind starts packing and planning all my Canadian outings.

There are so many things to do here before I go. I need to back up my photos off my laptop (doesn't everybody do that??) and get some videos copied so that we can watch them together in Canada. Gifts are packed, sorted and somehow the pile still continues to grow. There are so many food items that I'd like to bring and share with family and friends, things like dried durian (can't do it myself...the stuff stinks so bad even hotels won't let you take it into your room), prawn flavoured Pringles, coffee candies (from the island of Java), jelly drink (made from grass), and heaps of other things. If there's something you'd like to try specifically, let me know soon! Clothes are no big deal, I can wash and wear and sometimes even borrow. Shopping in Canada is also on the list of things to do. I think I can pack my suitcase in a day.

I've used specific events to pace myself. The deal was that I wouldn't worry about packing up until the Karawaci Ladies' used book sale at the Jakarta Highland Gathering (similar to Comox Valley's Highland Gathering, which was apparently held the same weekend) was over. That was held yesterday and we made a little cash, had good fun and met some great people. It was scorching hot, which later turned into a thunder/lightening storm, and made the area into one huge mud pit. A fun time was had by all, and all went home to scrub mud off of legs, backs, hair, clothes and shoes.

Now that the Gathering is over, my birth-month starts. A few good friends are taking me out to the Marriott Hotel in Jakarta this week, and it's another event that I am very excited about. I'm not necessarily excited about turning 40, but I'm not too worried about it either; I'm excited about the time spent eating and chatting that's coming up. I was talking with one today about how I'd love to get my Cdn girlfriends together with my girlfriends here, and how much fun it would be to be in one place with them all. Whenever anyone has come here and East meets West, we have a good time together. I guess that's what heaven's for...we'll all have tea ( chai, thanks) and get to know each other better.

It's time to end this post. It's too full of "I"s and "me"s.

Thanks for reading!

Zoey's Good News: Day 34

From Stephanie, Zoey's mom.

Zoey has had a big day today. She came out of traction this morning. We gradually lowered her legs over about 15 minutes to help them to adjust and minimize any discomfort. Then I soaked them in wet towels to loosen the adhesive and pulled off the tape from the traction. Her legs are peeling and very raw in large areas on her calves as to be expected. She was quite content to lie flat in her bed the rest of the morning so I didn't push her.

After her nap I picked her up and she enjoyed that. I did notice that she couldn't hold her head up initially, but her neck muscles quickly adjusted so that wasn't a problem after about half an hour or so. Next thing was sitting up which also was difficult for her to do - she was very wobbly and would fall to the side whenever she tried shifting her weight/trying to reach anything. It has now been 4 hours and I definitely see improvements in this area -- she is not completely stable but fairly good at staying upright without falling over so that is great. She is nowhere ready to walk yet -- we tried a few steps but she has lost muscle in her legs and she just flops around as she cannot put any weight on her legs yet. I know this will come too, but expect it could take a bit of time for that strength to come back. This is a bit frustrating for Zoey, but she is a determined girl so that will help her along.

The incision seems to be holding so far in her bladder area - perhaps a bit stretched from what I recall, but not dramatically different. She still has 1 catheter left which the chief urologist tried to remove yesterday by pulling hard on, but without success as it seems stuck in there for now. They'll try pulling to try to remove it again either tomorrow or Thursday. I am expecting we might see occupational therapy tomorrow to try to help regain some of her skills. She is on no restrictions for any activity. The chief orthopedic surgeon came by today and said the x-ray from yesterday shows there is excellent bone growth on her hips.

So all goes well so far. We are hoping to go home Thursday. I'll send more pictures once we get home as I cannot download them from here.

Love, Stephanie

Thanks for reading!

Golf Humour

Have you ever heard the joke about the old men who were golfing their 16th hole, high on a hill, when a funeral procession slowly drove by? One of the men took notice, stood up straight and tall, removed his cap and held it close to his heart. Another of the men commented on how much the first man respected the dead, and the man replied, cap on his heart, "well we'd been married for over 40 years!" For some reason, that joke has stuck with me (and I tell it much better when typing...no chance of telling the punchline before it's time!). It seems very sad to me, but a good indication of how some marriages end up...sports or hobbies put before one's spouse, probably because one's spouse is like a leaky faucet drip drip dripping all the time. It's my hope and prayer that no matter how much Tris loves golf, he'll always want to come home at the end.

With this in mind, a girlfriend and I decided to head out on our own to the local driving range while our husbands were out on the course. We'd hit a few balls, gather a few good stories about how far we hit those balls, and head home knowing we were working on our skills for the benefit of our husbands. It sounded good. Little did we know that we were going to create a sense of terror at the range. Before I go on, let me explain that clubs are hard to come by here. We could rent a bunch for $10 but why would we when my girlfriend has an old bag of woods and a putter in her garage?

When my friend M and I met at 7 am to head to the range, we realized that both husbands had taken our cars, so we popped the 3 woods (clubs) into M's bike basket and we rode our bikes to the range. It kind of reminded me of Huck and Tom riding their bikes to the creek with fishing poles on hand. Not a problem when you're in a hick town, but here, at one of the more prestigious places to play, we were directed IMMEDIATELY upon entry into the motorcycle parking. That didn't phase us. We took our three ancient (but very beautiful, I might add) woods to the front desk, and after a few wrong turns, we ended up at the range.

May I start by saying that I haven't hit a golf ball for at least two years, and M admitted the same. As a result, our first few tries were only ok. After a few more we had some pretty good shots going. I even felt a little cocky when I shot over 105 yards. Then, something happened. Something we can't quite put our fingers on. The balls starting hitting the post beside us, the metal plate beside us, and once, the roof above us. We giggled a bit, made funny faces at the staff who were watching us from a distance, and who moved an even greater distance after the first ball headed their way. I have to admit that after they were pegged off with the 2nd ball, they watched us while they ducked behind their counter, with only their very wide eyes staring at us. I think astonishment was in those eyes, but I'm not too sure. I was too embarrassed to look for very long.

I was so proud of myself when I heard the man next to us speaking Indonesian to a staff member, and I knew what he was saying. I was NOT so proud when I realized that the man was telling the staff member to change our rubber tee, that ours was too high. THAT's what was going wrong!! Except, the next few balls were almost as bad as before. Finally, we had two men approach us from either side. One was suggesting that we move our mat forward, so that our balls would no longer ricochet off the post to our right (and inevitably hit him). The second man actually left the lesson that he was teaching down the deck and, uninvited and without word, began to show M (she happened to be standing on the mat at the time) how to use the "power" in her arm. Apparently we were using power from our shoulders. Gotta remember that for next time! Thankfully he used up about 20 of our golf balls while showing M how to hit (we were done).

The miracle of it all was when this instructor grabbed a 7 iron from a staff member and let us use that ("FREE!" he said); we actually hit our balls straight and high. We looked not bad (can't say good yet) and although we just wanted to leave, were able to shoot out the rest of our balls without event or injury. I have to say that I chuckled from the moment that I laid eyes on the staff members hiding behind their counter, laughed a little harder when the man asked us to move our mat, and almost fell on the floor when the instructor insisted on helping us (and I am grateful to him). I tried not to disrespect the game of golf, but there was no respect in my playing, that's for sure. By the time we left, unable to make eye contact with anyone there except the instructor, who stuck his hand out for a shake as we passed, we were ready to burst. We hopped on our bikes, stuck the woods into the basket and rode our bikes home.

Our conclusion? We probably aren't made to golf, at least not a lot, but we ride our bikes REALLY well.

Thanks for reading.

Zoey's Update: Day 30

A good report on Zoey from Stephanie:

zoey is doing very well. 3 of 4 catheters have come out the past couple days and iv too and plan is to take her out of traction on tuesday at latest probably, observe her and the incision, remove the last catheter and then if all is well she'll go home around thursday! Not sure what to expect with her coming out of traction -- i would guess she might be stiff and we'll see how strong her muscles are. She is finally at the point where she is ok with nurses taking all her vitals and it is fun to see her helping with taking temp, putting the devices away, letting the nurse know if she forgot to do something, etc….and of course she says thank you when she they are done all the checks.

we are down to only 1 nurse check overnight and zoey has been doing well (but i guess i'm so used to waking up that now i'm waking up for no reason!).

we'll let you know how she does coming out of traction

Love, Stephanie

Mother's Day

What does it mean to be a Mother? I guess it's a different description for each woman, with our own experiences and situations. What I've learned is that it's hard being a mom, not because of the children being rotten (although that happens) but because of the love that you have for your kids.

I've been given a gift, and sometimes I take that gift for granted. I let life get my attention and forget to look at the world directly around me, the one that is really, truly the center of why I exist for these years I'm in right now. My heart mourns the days when these two beautiful, chubby (they were chubby once!) little babies filled my entire day. Now my two favourite times of the day are 1: when they head off to school and 2: even better, when they return! Although I do miss those days, and I actually cry tears when I think of how precious those days at home with Matthew and Abigail were, I am so thankful that they're growing up healthy, happy, and that they know the Lord.

When the kids entered elementary school and their lives began expanding, it was my duty to begin to cut loose the apron strings. One of my favourite "development" memories is of when I forced them, quite literally, to walk together the 1 1/2 country blocks to our mail box. I watched them walk down the street from my red front door, the mailbox key in Matthew's hand, and waited for their return. It took all of 6 minutes (I think they ran once they got to the corner of our street and the "bigger" country road) yet it was a big day for all of us.

Now, with Matthew in Middle School and Abby in her last year of Junior (elementary) school, I am struggling to keep up with where they are, who they are with, and what they're doing. I trust that they're making good choices, and usually they're just hanging with friends at the school, but it's my prerogative to keep tabs on them at all times. There's talk of university applications already, and where we'll be when they graduate highschool. Really, we're looking at a possible 4 years left with Matt in our home, and 6 with Abby. That goes by so quickly! When that happens I won't be there any more to hug them when they're sad, or hurt, or both. There won't be anyone to come home to a house that smells like cookies, made just for them. There'll be Tris, but he doesn't throw his stuff down, fling his shoes wherever, and run into the kitchen to see what's baking. He at least washes his hands first.

I think the biggest privilege I've ever had in my life is to be able to raise Matthew and Abby. I've struggled for years with the idea that I've not used my education for income, yet it's all ok when I think that I've got years ahead to pursue my education and to expand my skills when they're off doing their own thing. I am thankful that I've been a mom and I wouldn't change it for the world.

Thanks for reading.

Day 22: Update on Zoey

Here's an email from Stephanie regarding Zoey's recuperation in the hospital. Happy 2nd Birthday Zach and Zoey!

Zoey is back to doing well. Still on the antibiotics a couple days, but they seem to have done the trick. Nothing of concern at the moment, really. Her pain outbursts are much rarer these days and she is sleeping/napping well. Hopefully the remainder of our stay here remains uneventful :) Zoey and Zach turned 2 on monday. The hospital was nice enough to organize some balloons, decorations, cake and 3 presents each!

I'm off for my first run in about 2 years now haha! It is so flat here compared to home so should be easier to get out the door.

Hopefully all my remaining emails are so short! Love, Stephanie

Thanks for reading!

Proud to be Canadian

I love being Canadian. I'm coming home soon (gonna kiss the soil when I land, either that or jump for joy) and so of course my country is on my mind. I have to say I have neglected to keep up with local new, provincial news and for that matter, national news. I do know, however, that the Canucks just won 5-1 against Chicago Blackhawks yesterday, and I know that because we got to watch a game LIVE at 7 am Sunday morning. Unfortunately, during the week we'll have to miss the rest of the games because we go to bed around 9 pm, when we'd get the feed here, to wake up at 5 am the next morning.

A few weeks ago I had the privilege to speak to a kindergarten class in the local Montessori school about Canada. Not knowing what age I was going to address, I arrived with all sorts of goodies: loonies, toonies, a Canadian flag, books, photos, weird Canadian word definitions, an Eskimo doll (close enough...same continent!!!), and as much information as I could cram into a 40 minute period. To be honest, I am not sure that the young audience believed me when I told them of my Canadian upbringing. Some of the stories I told were: of the time my dad brought an abandoned bear cub home and we bottle fed it (in tears) when it cried out "ma...ma...ma"; of playing street hockey and yelling 'CAR!' every time a car passed (difficult to believe in a country that has a population density number/square kilometer of 123.7 compared to Canada's 3.3); of going outside and picking berries off of bushes near my house (berries grow on bushes??); and finally, a variety of snow stories that I could only compare to them sticking their heads in their fridge freezers. Some things are hard to relate to!

I thoroughly enjoyed talking about Canada, and by the time I finished I was ready to stand up and belt out our National Anthem...

O Canada, look out, here we come!!

Thanks for reading.

Exhibition...Almost over!!!

Abby's Exhibition project is almost over. Last week was the big public event, where the students presented their research through media (via slideshow, song, dance, skits, mime, etc) to an audience of parents, teachers, SPH students and students from other schools. The students did really well, and we were very impressed with the work that went into their presentations. After each one hour block of presentations, whether it was nutrition, natural disasters, education or pollution, all the students had another hour block to present from a small area where they had set up their posters, computers, hand outs, visuals. They were given a quota of needing to present to at least 3 parents and 3 teachers, as well as to some of the many students who funneled through. So many good comments came out of those classrooms by the adults!

Abby was in a group of 3 girls, and they rewrote a Jordin Sparks song (One Step at a Time) to talk about the need to educate others in nutrition. Here are the lyrics:

Hurry up, realize
That there are those poor in our eyes
Everything that they always wish for
Health, money, education
We gotta make that change

Want education but they don't have any school funds
Wondering how they're gonna get their education
And you know they can
If you lend a hand
Don't you know what their lives will be like
And you know that their school can change it
So in the world, they can fit
Waiting...

We live and we learn
To hold each others hand
To give what we earn
To change the people's lives
Through education
Of health, pollution, school and
Nutrition changed through our hands
We can make that change
Through education

Hurry up, realize
Every three minutes a child dies
All because health issues pass our eyes
Sicknesses, diseases, bad hygiene
Can effect their lives

Imagine and think where their next meal will come from
They're feeling weak, getting sick, they want nutrition
And you know they can
If you lend a hand
Don't you know what their lives will be like
And you know that their life's not easy
Hungry all day with thoughts so queasy
Waiting...

We live and we learn
To hold each others hand
To give what we earn
To change the people's lives
Through education
Of health, pollution, school and
Nutrition changed through our hands
We can make that change
Through education

When you're feeling sad and scornful
The poor should be mournful
Remember how they are struggling
The only way to help them
Is through education

To hold each others hand
To give what we earn
To change the people's lives
Through education
Of health, pollution, school and
Nutrition changed through our hands
We can make that change
Through education

We live and we learn
To hold each others hand
To give what we earn
To change the people's lives
Through education
Of health, pollution, school and
Nutrition changed through our hands
We can make that change
Through education

We are very proud of the work that Abby did. Now she has 2 weeks to do her Action Plan, where she and another girl from grade 6 will go into a slum area and teach a class of young school children about nutrition, in context to their situation of course.

Thanks for reading!

Zoey's Update: Day 16

Email update from Stephanie:

Zoey was doing fabulous until Thursday night, at which point she developed

a fever and pain in her abdomen. She may have developed an infection, but at this point they are choosing to monitor her instead of giving her extra antibiotics on top of what she already has. The fever comes and goes and fortunately the pain is not severe anymore, but she is restless and uncomfortable and has a hard time getting into a deep sleep. Yesterday she spent the day watching videos/tv and calm as long as I was holding her hand.

Orthopedics wanted to take her out of traction on May10th, pending the results of an upcoming xray, but urology doesn’t want her out of traction for a couple weeks after that likely as her bladder incision hasn’t healed enough yet. While of course it would be nice to get her out of traction, I am relieved to hear they feel that way as last time we had the surgery as soon as they took her out of traction, the incision

opened up. So it looks like we are indeed headed for the 5-6 weeks expected in hospital.

2nd Email a few hours later:

After I sent out the last update, Zoey got worse and started vomiting several times and couldn’t keep her medicine down so they decided to put her back on an iv so they could change the antibiotic and also give her fluids. Late afternoon she started to improve and had a bit to eat and was in better spirits again, giving us a few smiles. Hopefully the worst is over. Greg is staying with her again tonight to give me a break from the past week (what a great husband!).

Thanks for reading!